Thursday, June 14, 2018

Joshisms

Joshisms:

-- Me: Your feet are nasty!

Joshua: No, they're not!

Me: Yes they are! They're dirty and your toenails need to be cut. 

Joshua: We're hobos. Just say we're hobos. 


-- Joshua has a small Christmas tree in his room that he sometimes uses as a nightlight. He had gone to bed and a few minutes later came out of his room to ask:

Joshua: Mom, can I turn my light on?

Me: What light?

Joshua: *singing* It's Christmas time, it's Christmas time... (referring to the tree)

Me: I don't care. 

David: Just go get your butt back in bed.

Joshua: *as he walks down the hall* Don't be mean, it's Christmas time! 


-- Joshua: What are we having for dinner?

Me: I dont know. What would you like for dinner?

Joshua: That's a gooood question. If I had a beard, I'd be scratching it right now. 


-- Joshua to Bodie: This is my pumpkin, Darla. 

Bodie: *pats the pumpkin*

Joshua: Why are you touching her stem? That’s not appropriate. 


— Me: Go blow your nose, you have a whistle in there.

Joshua: I just gotta rearrange the furniture in there, that’s all. 


— Joshua: I was playing football and B jigged me and then tripped me.

Me: Jigged you??

Joshua: Yea, like went back and forth real fast...break your ankles.

Me: Oh! I know what “break your ankles” is; we used to say that, but Ive never heard of “jigged”. 

Joshua: Well, Mom, it IS 2017...and now we say jigged.

Me: 😑


— Me: Let’s go home and get some hot chocolate!

Joshua: You’ve got me all hyped up, Mama! 


— De va ju


— Today, we watched the snow and Mrs McCarty put on Christmas music and a fireplace. The song was 'It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year' and in my heart, I wanted to cry.


— While listening to John Mayer’s song, Assassin, Joshua asks, “Is he a real assassin or a love assassin?”


— I wish Bob Ross was still alive. I like his hair.