-- David & Josh were watching tv while I made dinner. Joshua comes in and says, "What we're watching? It's not very appropriate, but it's funny. It's called 'Science of Stupid'."
-- Joshua: Mom, who is that?
Me: The Pope.
Joshua: Pope? That's a funny name.
Me: That's not his name, that's his title.
Joshua: What's his real name?
Me: Ummm....I couldn't tell ya.
Joshua: Why can't you tell me?
Me: Because I don't know.
Joshua: Oh! I thought maybe it was a secret.
-- While eating lunch at "Chick-of-lay":
Joshua: Mom, what do these letters mean?
Me: I'm not sure but I think they help the employees know what's inside the box. Like, N for nuggets, S for strips and I don't know what the O could be for.
Joshua: Osome? (Awesome)
Me: Haha! Awesome starts with A but good guess!
-- Joshua: My sense of smell found you.
Me: Ooooh! Are you a dog?
Joshua: Yep. I'm a howling dog.
-- While playing with Jackson's farm animal figurines:
Joshua: Mom, is this pig itchy because it has lots of bumps on it.
Me: Well, that pig is a mama pig, so......
Joshua: Oh! They're suckers!
-- Me: Have you thought about what you want to put on your Christmas list?
Joshua: An electric scooter, a dirt bike. A kid one with a helmet. A Disney ticket and to go there. A puppy that is really a grown up dog but still looks like a puppy. The kind like we saw at the store (a little poofy white dog). 2 other little puppies. And you know that electric car that the triplets on our road that are always naked have? One of those.
-- I collected driftwood at the beach and when I got home, Joshua looked down in the bag and said, "Mulch?!".
-- Joshua had a check-up with the Doctor and my Aunt is a nurse there. She took his vitals and height, weight, etc and then took us to the exam room. Before she left, she asked him to get undressed and he was shocked. When she left, he asked me, "Is this a joke?"
-- "I got two prizes today. I'm the luckiest kid ever!"
-- While watching Charlie Brown Thanksgiving:
"That girl (Lucy) is gonna move the ball and Charlie Brown's gonna land right on his back. It happens every time!"
J: She's not a sir!
Me: Marcy calls everyone Sir.
J: Why? Oh! She's blinded!
(She wears glasses but you can't see her eyes.)